


I Fear Myself More Than I Fear You

by LyzaWyx



Category: Afraid of Monsters & Cry of Fear, Simon Henriksson - Fandom
Genre: F/M, idk how to tag im new
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-11-06 07:31:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11031522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyzaWyx/pseuds/LyzaWyx
Summary: Simon Henriksson (cry of fear protagonist) x Readerincludes violence, blood and gore, offensive language, drug abuse, triggering situations, eventual smut.





	1. Without Words

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah I know Simon lived in a little red house, but making him and the reader more close range /apartment building/ seemed easier for this.
> 
> Simon meets someone more trusting.

Loud, loud, loud. Screaming. Whispers, quiet and soft and growing. Pulsating. In. Out. Everywhere.   
Scattered.   
Stop.   
Stop.   
STOP!  
Why won't it stop...  
  


Simon rubbed his temples. His eyes throbbing in his skull. He drowned out the loud thoughts with his music. Fully blasted in each ear.  
  


He tried to keep his attention on the passing trees and the cold rain droplets slipping down the window. He loved weather like this. The way the sky would darken and weep as he had done many times before.   
The train swayed with the wind. Abruptly stopping occasionally. 

He checked the clock on his small phone. Yeah, maybe a half hour or so till he reached his destination.  
  
He planned on returning to Kirkville, his hometown, to see his beloved mother one last time.   
  
He slid his phone back in the pocket of his hoodie, gently grazing his blade with his fingertips as well.   
He stared down at his arm, ruffling his sleeve up revealing his wrist adorned with dark thick scars. He walked his fingertips against them.   
  
'Im gonna make this go away..' he whispered to himself. He wanted the loudness in his brain to silence itself. 

But in his own, self-dignified way. Not with the assistance of false pills and the drugs. 

At least he gave himself peace with seeing his mother one last time. 

For a while, the train was a bit overcrowded. His hair stood on end as he felt the many hot breaths and rhythmic beats of the bodies surrounding him.   
  
He counted the droplets as they fell.  1, 4, 7, 9, 13, 16, 21... so on... 

He felt the seat sink in beside him. He gulped and folded into himself. Avoiding all contact will the stranger.. that was surprisingly.. sweet smelling.   
Like the mixture of honey and hint of cigarettes. 

Simon could really go for a cigarette at the moment. It wasn't in his nature to socialize, especially with strangers. He glanced out the corner of his eye.   
  


A girl, seemingly his age, sat next to him. Headphones embedded in her ears as well as him.   
Her eyes shut calmly. Her chest would rise and fall, like she was sleeping.   
  


Simon stared at her for a moment, a lump rising in his throat on whether or not to say something.   
  
The tobacco scent she gave off was intoxicating to him. And damn it had been a while since he had one. 

'make up your mind Henriksson..' he began to curse himself. 'you want a fucking cig or not?'

Slowly.. he bit his lip and tapped her shoulder gently.   
Almost instantly her (e/c) eyes flew open and she removed her headphones.   
  
"Yes?" she questioned looking him in his very dark stone like brown eyes 

He stuttered, averting her gaze "I-I uh.. um..."   
She raised an eyebrow.   
Finally, he sighed deep and low, "You got any cigarettes?" 

'nice going bud' 

She flashed him a smirk and nodded. "Yeah, sure here ya go." 

Digging out her pack from her pocket and giving him not one, but two little cancer sticks.   
He was a bit flustered. "Wow.. Thank you." Simon gently took them from her hand. 

She chuckled slightly, "No problem, I like being generous."   
The corner of his lip tugged upward, a sideways smirk.   
  
"So where you heading?" She turned her body towards him, giving all her attention.   
  
He was a bit surprised she continued to conversate with him. But he attempted to conform and at least not be rude. After all, he just got a nice smoke for the night. 

"Kirkville, going out to see my mother." He mumbled.   
  
Her smile grew, "Oh yeah? My stop too. You live around the plaza?" 

Simon nodded, slightly unraveling himself from the window. "Yes actually. The apartments there. Lived there my whole life."   
  
"Hey same! I got settled on the bottom floor. How come I haven't seen you around?"  
Simon shrugged and turned to the window again. 

"I don't get out much.."   
  


The girl gave Simon and sympathetic look. "Yeah me neither." 

Silence filled the space between them for a moment. Painfully his head would soon start to shout again. So he decided to continue his perfect distraction from his self.   
  
"I'm Simon. Henriksson." He awkwardly gestured his hand out to her. She didn't hesitate to shake it.   
  
"(f/n), (l/n). It's nice to meet you."   
  
The train halted suddenly, slightly throwing them forward.   
Both stood and walked off the train, paying their tickets and stepping out of the platform. 

..................................

 

They walked together towards the center of town. Not saying a word but oddly enjoying the company of each other. Sitting on the base of the fountain they kept a foot of space between them, Simon pulled out his little prize from his new companion.   
  
He put the unfiltered cigarette between his chapped lips and patted himself down.   
Pockets, hoodie, bag.   
No lighter. 

(name) shook her head slightly and snickered. "Here." she handed him her matchbook. 

'what a doll' he thought 

'way too good to me..' 

He flicked out a match, its light bursting to life as he ignited his tobacco stick. 

Inhale... ecstasy.. exhale.. pain relief.    
"Damn.." Simon breathed. 

"Nice huh?" (name) responded to his sigh. He smirked. genuinely smirked and nodded his head slowly. 

He looked down at his hand with lidded eyes. His smokey treat resting on his dirty fingers.   
 'what a day..' 

..............................................


	2. Loud Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're in the back of his mind

They parted after the day grew cold and dark, each heading to their own dens and exchanging goodbyes...

Simons mother was certainly excited her son had returned home. She continuously hugged him in tight embraces, cooked him warm meals and spoiled him with the TV. Consistently reminding him it was 'his day' meaning to relax. 

What is there to relax. Tense was just a second nature to him. As well as lying... 

"Are you alright, sweetie?" 

  
"yes mom."

"Have you been feeling well?"  
  
"yes mom."   
  
"Have you been sleeping alright?"  
  
"yes momma."   
  
"Are you hungry?"   
  
"no mom."   
  
"Have you been taking your meds."   
(this question especially)   
  
"yes..." 

As cold as Simon was, his mother was very dear to him, putting up with him for all these years.   
Unconditionally loving and trusting her son.   
  
The last thing he needed was for her to worry or fear for him. 

....................

His mom was long gone deep in sleep, Simon lied awake in his bed.   
He clothes and his sheets sprawled on the floor. 

His head was pulsating again. Screaming his suppressed violence.   
  
The images of the nighmares, the blood. The bodies. The screaming. The crying.   
'stop it' 

He reached over to his nightstand pulling off his little mp3 and selected his music. Cranking the volume and drowning out the words his mind kept forming.   
  
'pathetic'

'worthless' 

'die' 

'kill yourself' 

"Stop it Simon" he interrupted himself and kept pressing his headphones in.

His plan to off himself slipped his mind thanks to his mother. And what a blessing she was to him. Unknown though. 

The throbbing unter his eyelids continues on the night. He, on reflex, kept switching songs as they faded in and out. 

'think about something else' 

-'or think about how good it would feel to drain the blood from your veins Simon' 

'something else. something good' 

-'the knife is right next to you Simon'   
  
'no, no, no... stop it please' 

-'just die' 

"STOP!!" He shouted to himself. Causing the world to freeze. He shivered and covered his now tear soaked face. 

'what a mess'

He kept racking his brain for something different. A distraction. 

-'Sophie'

More tears slipped from his heavy dark eyes. "No.. not her" he whimpered. 

-'She hates you'

'I know..' 

He sniffled and wiped his face with his sleeve. Throwing his legs over his bedside and sitting up. Staring into the darkness of his room. Simon stood and shuffled his feet to the window. 

The street was illuminated by glowing lamps and the light of a pale moon. And his eyes drifted to the fountain. He remembered his last cigarette. 

Now he sat comfortably in a chair by his window. Exhaling and inhaling till he was intoxicated with the nicotine. 

'(name)' 

Simon's eyes widened slightly at the name ringing in his ears now. He closed his eyes for a moment as he sucked in another cloud of smoke.  
Although it was a short time. He memorized her details. From the halo of shining (h/c) hair to her (e/c) eyes. Rounded innocent looking face. The kindness she gave off was almost baffling.  
Simon was not one to talk, but for some strange reason, he was compelled to use his voice around her. To hatch himself ever so slightly from his shell.

Maybe this was his opportunity to make a new friend for once. 

'You'll fuck up again' 

Of course he thought that. He was a psychotic emotional wreck. Unworthy of such treatment. 

Never had he felt significant in his life. Special, or talented. It was pretty obvious why he had never had any true friends. And in his mind, it was plenty of reason he should kill himself. 

"Not tonight.." he sighed to himself. Finishing off his cigarette and flicking it out the window. Images of (name)'s face flashed under his eyelids.   
  
"Let's just see where this goes." 

Simon closed his window and returned to his bed. More arguing with himself till time itself stopped existing.   
  
Once again he looked at his window. Now flooded with sunlight.   
  
His mother knocked on his door softly before peeking her head in.   
"Good morning hun, did you sleep alright??" 

He turned his head to her and gave a very weakly forced smile.   
  
"yes momma." 

........................................

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I know, it was kinda short but i got more ;)


	3. Good Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drugs.

"Oh fuck.. Oh fuuuuuck~" Simon drawled out, groaning. He could feel the drugs hitting him like a freight train. He was curled up in a fetal position in the kitchen. Never, NEVER again would he buy acid from the shady guy by the smoke shop. 

He held his throbbing skull as he tried desperately to focus his eyes and regain his balance. He needed to leave.   
No knowledge as to where but he needed to leave before his mother returned. Find some quick way to sober up. 

Or bash his own skull in, whichever came first..

He used the counter to hold himself up as he quickly shuffled towards the door. Dragging his bag behind him and struggling to use the doorknob properly. 

Out the door, the existence of the elevator slipped his mind as he dragged his feet behind him to the stairwell. 

About 10 steps in he lost his footing and found his body being thrown down. When he halted he was down on his stomach laying by a pair of strangers feet.   
  
"Simon??" A familiar feminine voice spoke. He attempted to look up only to see a blur of color. His vision was darkening as he felt his heartbeat pulsing in his ears. 

He groaned up at her in response. (name) hesitantly grabbed his arm and helped him up to his knees. "What the hell?? Simon what happened?" 

He groaned again and slumped his head. She sighed and began to pull him up and drag him away. He could barely keep his eyes open but he felt the pressure beneath his feet as she directed him through a dark doorway and into a room. And like that, everything went blank. 

...........

(Name) took Simon into her home, shouting for her relative to come to her aid. She rested his now limp body on her sofa and lifted his head back.   
  
"Whats up (na-) who the fuck is that??" Her brother stood in the hall staring at the drugged boy.   
 "Shut up and Help me, Chris! " She snapped. He kneeled by her side as she lightly slapped Simons face trying to get him back to consciousness.   
The boy just groaned.   
  
"Is he drunk?" Her brother questioned examining his limp state. "doesn't smell like it."   
She held his face up by his chin and opened one of his lidded eyes with her finger gently.   
His mouth was ajar and drooling, his pupils wide as saucers across his eyes. 

She sighed and let go of his face. "Chris get some ice water, he's drugged." 

As Chris escaped to the kitchen he spoke through the walls, "Who the hell is this guy? How do you know him??" 

She tried to prop him up with a pillow. "His name is Simon, hes..a friend." 

Chris returned with a tall glass of water overflowing with ice, she took it from him and tilted it back into her friend's lips.   
Seconds later Simons eyes flew open as he coughed and sputtered up the water, spilling all over his face. 

Fear struck him as his vision was distorted and he could not recognize his surroundings or the people in front of him. The cold water down his throat burned through his body. The cold turned to a sudden heat rising up his throat.   
  
He threw up all over himself, it pouring from his mouth onto his hoodie and on the floor.   
  
Simon was out again. 

.....................................

When his eyes opened, he felt a breeze hit his arms. The ceiling fan above him spun slowly.   
He was cushioned underneath.   
Simon blinked, his focus returning. A rancid taste in his throat and his stomach rumbled.

He lifted his body up slowly rubbing at a headache that raked his brain. 

"what did you take?" 

The sudden voice startled him.  He studied his surroundings. He was laying on a bed in a very small box shaped room. The warmth of another body near him. (name).   
  
He was slightly relieved but still confused. He stared at the younger girl in front of him. She wore loose gray plaid pajama pants and a black tee-shirt that framed her upper body. Her hair was pulled up in a mess tie. She was holding a black pipe in her hands.   
(name) repeated herself, looking at him with expressionless eyes.   
  
"What did you take?" 

"Acid." he replied weakly. She sighed deep. "Are you sure it wasn't heroin?" She gestured to the puncture wounds in his bare forearms.   
His face grew red as he crossed his arms. Hiding his many scars. "That's none of your fucking business." Simon snapped. 

"Maybe not." She turned herself towards him. "I'm not judging you, Simon, I'm just concerned." 

He scowled, "You don't need to be." 

(name) chuckled a bit. "I kinda have to be. I just washed your vomit off yourself and let you sleep in my bed." 

Now his face burned in embarrassment. "Th-thanks..." He muttered and held his head in his hands. 

"Wheres my hoodie?" Simon asked. She waved her hand towards her door.   
"In the wash, I took care of it for you." 

He hated how naked he felt under her eyes. His deep scars and needle wounds visible for all to see. He rubbed his fingers across his arms. His heart dropping painfully in his chest.   
  
Another sigh sounded from her lips. Without saying anything she turned over her wrist to him, showing the many scars, old and fresh, littering her arms. Her skin like porcelain, his skin a darker tan color.   
  
"One of a kind my friend." (name) smiled at him. Simon was surprised, and a bit saddened by the sight.   
The pain in his heart throbbed. 'at least you're not alone' he thought. 

He let go of his arms. And turned his attention back to the object in (name)'s hand. A black pipe with a little lighter. 

She noticed his gaze fell there and she giggled a bit. "Only kind of drug we should be doing."   
Holding it up to Simon, he took it from her hands and smirked down at the green leafy bud in the bowl.   
  
"Take a hit my dude, it should help."   
He did as told, inhaling deeply as the sweet earthy taste hit him.   
  
"Thank you.." He breathed. She nodded.   
  


"For everything.." 

...................................................


	4. Calming my Violence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're his "something else"

"Please remember Simon, if anything happens. Or if you need something, just come by. I promise I'll be here." (name) spoke sweetly to him. Her voice rung softly in his ears.   
  
Here he was again, laying in bed, neck outstretched staring out into the night beyond his windowpane.  He was at it again. Sleepless, his brain filled with his own voices.   
  


He would wonder off to a hellish place again and again. The bodies, the blood... He could keep his eyes shut because of it.   
  
If his mind wasn't in his personal hell, he would wonder why he hasn't killed himself yet. The many times he even questioned his own life. How he had abused his body with the drugs, the constant torture of blades.....the rape. 

'pathetic' 

again he screamed to himself. 

'die already'

He clawed at his messy dark hair. 'something else, think something else' 

'die' 

'all I want you to do is die' 

'something else' 

'die'

'die' 

'die' 

'die' 

'(name)' 

Simons eyes widened. "(name)" He whispered to himself. 

Suddenly his voices grew quiet and distant.   
  
"(name)" he spoke again. The fullness of his brain depleted, not gone, but calm.   
  
He closed his eyes tightly. "(name).." He breathed out. 

The image of the younger girl imprinted into his dark vision. The fact, she had barely known him and had already shown so much sympathy and genuine kindness.   
  
Something he hasn't experienced in a very long time. Something about her...

Calmed his hellfire to a smolder. This was his 'something else' to think about. 

Maybe he wasn't ready to die yet. Maybe her view would make his life a bit more bearable. 

...

Or maybe her rejection would eat out his guts like Sophie had done to him. Once was a name that would make him smile, now made him slip deep into darkness.   
A happy name that now made him weep.   
  
His hot tears wettened the pillow beneath his head.   
  
'something else' 

'(name)'

'my something else' 

Something that could be good to him..

...................................................................................

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another really short chapter sorryyyy


	5. Physically Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oh mY GOD SIMON WANTS LOVE

Simon felt like a child again, finally having his first playdate.   
To him, it almost felt like a _date._

Sunday morning rose coldly in town, the sun shrouded by clouds one again. A normal day more or less. He planned on doing nothing more than zoning out to his music, watching TV, maybe playing with himself.   
But instead, a distinct buzzing sounded from his bag early in the morning. 

His mother wasn't even awake at this time. He rolled himself off his bed sideways to reach into his bag.  

_1 new message:  
-(nickname) _

_"Hey Simon! wanna hang today??  
Got some smokes for your liking. I'll be alone."_ 

He couldn't help himself from smiling down at his little glowing phone.   
  
 _Simon-reply:_  
 _"Be there in a sec :)"_  
  
He almost cringed to himself for adding a useless emoticon but it seemed to fit the feeling deep in his chest.   
  
It confused him, it shivered in his heart. He wasn't sure of it meant he wanted to burst out laughing or cry. Suppressing it. He threw himself out of bed and adorned himself in his usual clothing.   
Slipping on his black jeans and throwing over his favorite gray festival hoodie over his bare chest. 

He peered around the hall and into the open door of his mother room, listening to the rhythm of soft snores and deep breaths. He sighed and quietly stepped out to the front door.   
Pulling up his boots and unlocking the entrance.   
Shutting it behind him as he left, careful not to make a noise. 

.......................

He froze at the familiar door, his arm mid extended out to knock. The anxiety rising in him.  He hated this part. Simon needed to make a decision whether to flee or proceed to become social with another person.   
  
He wasn't one to begin things, but to finish them or run.   
  
But the voice in the back of his brain clawing at him to 'suck it up' 

He knocked softly. 

In seconds he heard the shuffling and incoherent curses behind the door.   
Then it was opened. 

(name) stood in front of him with a big grin, she was in a short little black dress and long socks. Her (h/c) hair in a mess of sorts around her shoulder and her bright (e/c) eyes bloodshot and hooded.    
  
"Hey! Simon come in."   
She grabbed his arm and forced him in. 

As she shut the door he paced around the front room, it was smoky and reeked of marijuana. He sat down on the sofa (where he had his drugged mishap a few weeks before) and look towards the girl in front of him. 

She giggled as she flopped down beside him, her shoulder resting on his.   
Simon flinched at the sudden contact but oddly felt comfortable under it. He chewed his lip as his skin heated up, compelling him to stay still, all of his feeling the need to get closer. But he still froze.  

A moment of silence passed, he listened to her small breaths. 

To break the ice, (name) spoke.   
"I have an idea.." And like that, she was up again. And the comfortable feeling left Simon. His skin growing cold again. 

She waltzed over to a shelve in the corner of the room, fidgeting through unorganized books and CDs. 

"How about some music?" She pulled out a stack of CDs and shuffled through them. "What do you like?" 

"What do you have?" placing his hands on his knees and leaning forward comfortably.   
  
(name) shrugged. "Eh.. don't laugh. I'm a bit of a scenie weenie."   
  


Simon flattened his lips holding back a chuckle for her at the strange comment.   
"What's that supposed to mean?" 

She turned back towards him and showed the faces of the many CDs in her arms.   
"Rock, metal, electro, rap, you name it." 

He smirked, "You should know by now (nickname)" He pointed his thumb behind his back, turning to show off his favorite hoodies emblem.   
  
Her jaw dropped slightly, eyebrows raised. "No fair! You went to the freedom festival??"   
He nodded to her, a bit of pride filling him to her reaction.   
  
As she took it, Simon was one hell of a metal head. Even posing some pins on his bag. 

She gave him a large smile and selected one disc and opening it up. "How about some KoRn?" 

Simon gave a toothy grin in return. "Classic." 

.........................................

Time stopped existing again, for both of the teens. They shared music interests, swapped stories and laughs, smoked here and there. Never realizing the early morning became mid-day. Then almost dark. 

Throughout that time, Simon caught himself staring deeply into the face of his beautiful female friend in his presence. She was a blessing to him, some miracle.   
He pushed himself to memorizes every detail. Every line, scar, dimple, mark on her body. Her physical shapes and colors.   
  
He was astounded with how much she related to him. The only difference, she was confident and open. She spoke her words with full voice and volume. But small and sweet to him. 

Simon was often a stuttering mess, mumbling his words and avoiding much interaction. But today something in him changed. 

'happy' the word bounced around the walls of his head.   
  
He hadn't given it much thought, maybe he was oblivious to it. But in the very short time they had known each other, she has been changing his life. 

As idle conversation continued. Simons phone buzzed loudly.   
He quickly shuffled his hands over himself and wiped it out. 

 _1 new message:_  
-Mom  
"Honey where are you? Haven't seen you all day. Let me know where you are and when you'll come home."

Simon sighed deep. Unsure of how to reply.   
  
"Who is it?" (Name) questioned looked up at him from a lower angle. He let her view the screen. "Just mom.." He mumbled. 

She flashed him another one of her sweet smiles. "I'd love to meet her." 

He raised a brow, "...why?"   
  
"Because" She tilted her head a bit. "She made you. I bet she's just as wonderful as you are."   
  
When the words processed in his brain, his face immediately began to redden and burn. 

He opened his mouth but no sound passed his lips.  
  
(name) just giggled noticing how the red canceled out his deeply tan skin. "Let me come over sometime"   
  
"I-uhh...o-okay." He sputtered.   
  
Geeze he couldn't get any cuter at the moment. The younger girl adored his reactions. Feeding off the flustered expression written on his handsome face.   
  
"okay.." He repeated, much clearer now. 

............................................

Now the night was black, and he was ordered by his protective mother to return home.   
(Name) opened the door for him, following him out into the hall.   
  
Simon looked down, awkwardly scratching at his messy mop of black hair.   
"So... (name) I'll see you again right?"

Another small giggle emitted from his pink lips.   
"Duh silly. I'll be seeing you real soon Simon" She winked at him. Triggering another dusting of pink across his cheeks. 

"But I think you need some sleep." 

Simon nodded, taking that as a sign he needed to leave. But before he stepped towards the stairs, he was taken into a tight embrace.   
  
(name) wrapped her arms around his torso, nuzzling her face into his warm chest. A tender hug.   
  
He jolted for a moment, but as she squeezed him, he relaxed again. His arms falling softly on her shoulders, hugging her back. 

His heart thumping violently in his chest. Her warmth and the smooth feeling of her skin. He felt like his knees would buckle below him. Almost feeling he would faint.   
  
The first close contact he had actually felt in a very long time.   
  
But it passed way too soon for his liking. Her warmth leaving him. But her smile wide and bright, he couldn't stop himself but returning one back to her.   
  
She stepped back into her doorway. "Goodnight Simon"   
  
And like that, the beautiful young girl was out of sight. 

..........................................


	6. Fearing the Worst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *gasp*

Simon was in Hell again. Running, panting, his heart violently pounding in his cage. The horrid screams and the mechanical metallic sawing sound followed him. His lungs burned as he refused to stop, turning lefts and rights. Desperately trying to escape. The alley was narrow and seemed to stretch out forever. Darker and Darker as the street lights around him seemed to dim.   
And then to his amazement, he made the right turn leading into the empty street. 

The threatening sound of the sawrunner faded, and soon he slowed his pace to a halt. Collapsing to his knees and sucking in air painfully filling his lungs. He groaned and whimpered. Regaining his breath. 

He wanted to die, leave this place. But all he could do was double over himself, his head in between his knees and cry. He couldn't grasp his will to live or die by the hands of those monsters... 

'No... I just need to get out of here... I need to get home' He repeated to himself. 

He slowly got back on his feet and progressed down the street. Checking for open doors or shortcuts. But for a while, all he did was walk down the empty street, cars in pileups, trash littered everywhere, and blood... So much blood, everywhere.   
  


The only sound was the ominous heavy silence. Almost hurting his ears. 

It was almost sickening how afraid he was...nothing was happening. He couldn't hear a single voice or wail of the creatures. 

Maybe this was his only opportunity to rest. 

He dragged himself under a car that was rammed into a street lamp, the front door open.   
He just about threw himself into the cushioned front seat, followed by a deep sigh of relief. He was so tired.. Tired of running and killing for his life.   
  
He couldn't get the images out of his head, the faces... the distortion of their bodies. His living nightmares.   
  
Simon rested his head against the wheel in front of him, staring out at the dark starless sky. His loved city in ruins.   
  
He closed his eyes for a moment, taking in the silence.   
  


.....

But that didn't last.. He heard, very faintly, in the distance, a high-pitched scream. Echoing.   
  
This got his attention, he stood up out of the car. Trying to focus his ears, waiting to hear it again.   
  
The scream sounded, much louder this time. A woman, sounding like she was in excruciating pain. It sent chills up his spine.   
  
Then she screamed again, even louder. But she was saying something. He couldn't quite hear what.   
  
He cautiously walked towards the direction it came from. Down another alley, past the building in front of him.   
  
Then it happened again.. But this time, perfectly clear. 

...

"SIMON!!!"   
  
"SIMON HELP ME!!!"   
  


His heart lurched at the sound of his name hitting his ears. He didn't hesitate and broke out in a sprint. Forcing his sore legs to carry him as fast as he could possibly go. 

Her screams filled his ears. His heart racing again.   
  
He was now in a familiar place, the central square. Her screams sounding from inside the tall yellow apartment building.   
 As he got close, her screams abruptly stopped. 

Fear struck him as Simon threw open the entrance door. Only to be met with darkness.   
  
He stepped in something wet and warm. A sick feeling rose up in his stomach as he stared down at a trail of fresh blood.   
  
"H-hello?!" He shouted into the darkness. 

Nothing. More silence. 

He moved his feet along the trail of dark liquid. Closing in on a small source of light. He peered down a hall, past boarded up doors and broken glass to the only open room. Illuminated with light.   
  
He hesitated but pulled himself in... 

As the light hit his eyes. He saw the horrific sight before him. 

"(name)..." He breathed. Running to her body.   
  
She was torn apart, her lower abdomen shredded open. Chunks of flesh, her organs spilling out from the large opening. Gutted like a deer. Her legs broken in grotesque angles. But her chest slowly rising and falling. 

Simon couldn't help but scream. Everything flowing through his body in painful emotions.   
Fear, Greif, Sadness, Confusion, Anger, Hatred.   
He fell to his knees and crawled to her ruined body. He grabbed her head with both of his shaking hands, sobbing loudly. Her eyes fluttered open.  Bloodied and hollow.   
More blood sputtered out of her mouth, she gargled.   
"Si...Simon." She managed to whisper. 

More tears poured from his eyes, he cried loudly.  
  
"(Name)..who did this to you??" 

Very slowly she lifted a blood soaked arm, her fingertips softly grazing his cheek. Wiping his tears but only to result in mixing them with her blood. 

Her eyes would lift up to look at him. He grasped her hand in his on his face tightly.  

She moved her lips again as if to speak. But no sound.   
"(Name)..be still. Please.." He cried into her hand. Her lips kept moving, making a small sound.   
He leaned into her to hear.   
  
"B..behind...you.." 

He froze. 

There it was, that horrific revving sound. The sawrunner.   
  
He wipped his head around to see it running towards them at incredible speed.   
Before Simon could lift his arms up in defense.   
  
It struck him. His vision went red. 

..............................

Simon woke with a frightened jolt. Forcing his body up. His eyes wide with terror. Sweat soaked every inch of his body. His face stained with hot tears. He hyperventilated for a moment..   
Then realized, he was in his room. Laying in bed...  
He wasn't in hell.. he was safe.   
  
But then the nightmarish images of (name)s body... her screams filling his ears. How he was soaked in her blood. 

He panicked and pulled himself out of bed. Falling to the floor and dragging his body to his bag, which he had thrown across his room prior.   
He grabbed its strap and pulled it to him. Frantically juggling through the items inside to find his phone. 

He dialed in (name)s number quickly. His heart pounding as he listened to the ringing.. 

It rang.. once.. twice.. again..again.. again.. 

Then it clicked.   
  
"..Simon??"   
  
He gave a deep sigh of relief, choking on his words. 

"(n-name)... are you okay??"   
  
She yawned from the other end, her voice filled with concern.   
  
"Um..Simon, I'm fine... Are _you_ okay? Its 3:30 in the morning.."   
  


Simon slowly began to regain his breath. His heart calming.   
"Y-yeah... I'm so sorry.. I-I just, I uh.." He stuttered. Cursing himself for not using his words correctly.   
  
"I thought.. something happened. To you, I mean." He finally said.   
  
Shuffling was heard on the other end. Then, "What do you mean? What would happen to me?" 

Simon rubbed his temples. Then wiping the dry tears from his eyes.   
  
"Nothing. It's nothing. I'm so sorry (name)... I didn't mean to wake you." Sadness dripping from his voice.   
  
"Simon.. it was a nightmare."   
  
He said nothing, she was right. It wasn't real. His hell. Wasn't real.   
She was alive, safe. She was never sawn in half by the insane masked monster that chased him in dreams. 

But she knew. He freaked out for nothing. 

"I'm sorry.." He repeated quietly. 

"Don't be sorry. You can't help it. I have nightmares too." She reassured him. At that moment, he yearned for her. Needed her there with him. To feel her again.   
  
"(name).." 

"Yes, Simon?" 

"I..."   
His jaw froze, half open. The rest of the words stuck down in his throat, unfamiliar to him. He couldn't say it.   
  
He closed his mouth. Then opened again. changing his course.   
"I'll let you go. I didn't mean to disrupt your sleep..."   
  
Another yawn came from her end. "Okay... Goodnight Simon. Call me if it happens again.." 

He shook his head, hating himself for a moment, she sounded like she pitied him.. 

"Okay.."   
  
"I'll see you in the morning." Was the last thing she said before she hung up.   
  
Simon dropped his phone in his lap. He looked down. 

"What is wrong with me..?" He said to himself. 

'Coward' 

His voices came back to him. And for the rest of the night. He just sat there in the darkness. 

'Alone'

.....................................

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awwww Simon tryna' confess his love <3 poor shy baby


	7. Loving Mother

Simon never returned to sleep after his incident last night. Although now that the sun was shining through his window he calmed down. His voices quieting as the darkness left him. Left his town.   
Now he could concentrate. But his hands kept shaking uncontrollably. He was sure he was becoming another heavy burden to this girl that trapped herself in his brain.   
But her words 'I'll see you tomorrow' reassured him. At least she wanted to see him...

Or did she feel like she had to? He desperately prayed to himself, 'please..please don't be another Sophie..'

But this girl was much better than what he'd seen in Sophie. She shared her heart with him. They had their scars. She wasn't afraid of him. Afraid of his music, his style, his many night terrors.   
She was like another half that he felt was missing. (Name) was his sanity.. 

.....

Today he remembered his plan. He was going to invite her over for the first time. That's why he was shaking. Afraid of what would be said with his mother. 

He intentionally skipped his breakfast, his appetite failing him. He walked into the living room, sitting in a cushioned chair opposite to his mother, who was reading the latest newspaper articles.   
He was quiet for a while, only mumbling a 'good morning' 

He kept running over an imaginary script in his head, on what he would say.   
  
"Hey, mom?" He turned to her. 

She lifted her head to him, smiling very sweetly. "Yes, honey?" 

He clasped his hands together, rubbing his knuckles. Being his mother she was all too familiar with her son's inability to concentrate on conversations. He was never social.   
She waited for him to continue, patiently smiling.   
  
"I was wondering... I would like to have a friend over." His voice fell quiet at the end. Like he was scared of her response.   
  
She brightened up. "Oh, is it Sophie?"   
He flinched and closed his eyes for a moment, pushing that thought back far into his head. 

"No mom, not her."   
Her smile fell a little. "David?" She mentioned his older friend. Who he had not talked to since school was out. He shook his head.   
  
"No. Not David.."   
  
His mother set the paper beside her on the coffee table. "Simon, you made a new friend?" Her smile widened again.   
  
He nodded very slow, looking at the floor. "I've been seeing her a lot lately... She asked to come over." 

"Her?? You were out late last night with another girl??" Concern dripped in her voice, almost accusingly.

His face burned a bit at what she was implying. "M-mom she's just a f-friend. I met her last month on the train.."   
  
She settled back in her chair, still smiling. "Well, that's wonderful! I'd love to meet her."   
He looked back into her brown eyes, that matched his own. Taking her cheerful response as a yes.   
  
Simons lips tugged upward in a semi-smile. "Thanks..mom. She'll be over today." 

...................

Even after his mother's positive approval of the new female he was letting into his life, he was still unbelievably nervous. 

He felt as if every word that would fall from his mouth would embarrass him.. He didn't realize at first, but he was so utterly desperate to impress (name) 

He looked in the mirror in his room. Simple black long sleeve sweatshirt, gray sweatpants, fingerless gloves, and his black boots. Maybe an odd looking outfit, but he only wore what covered his butchered limbs. Next, he combed his dark black hair with his fingers. It didn't help in any way.   
His hair was always a mess, tufts of hair sticking in out all directions, straight with no flow to it.   
  
He patted it down then, slightly changing the effect.   
  
'Impress? she pities you' a voice broke out, he averted the gaze with himself.   
He didn't like the way the other him looked when he spoke. 

'What a mess you are Simon. Stop trying.' 

He rubbed his knuckles around his temple, wanting to ignore himself. 

'Sophie left you, she never loved you, now this one will do the same.'

He sat down on the edge of his bed, continuing the rub his sensitive skull. all the images in his eyes. How he begged Sophie, pleaded his love. Fell to his knees for her. And she blatantly rejected him. How he knew every day he made things worse for her. When all his intentions were to bloom from his shell.   
She forced him back to his dark place. So she could save herself. 

He wanted something else. A different experience with love. 

'Give up' his voice echoed. 

...............................

There was a knock on the door. Simon's heart dropped a little. Sweat beaded at his forehead as he hesitantly stood up and left his room. His voices didn't stop. They grew tremendously, feeding his anxiety.   
  


'Fucking give it up'

He walked closer to the door.

'Ruin this bitch'

'She won't love you' 

He turned the knob to open the door with shaking hands. 

'Give up' 

'Give-' 

As the door was open, and Simon looked down at the shorter girl in front of him. It all went silent in his head. There was a pause, where he couldn't find words, his ears ringing.   
  
"Hey Simon!" (Name) didn't wait for him, she wrapped her arms around his torso, nuzzling into his warm sweatshirt. Heat rose from the very source she touched him, evaded is personal space, but so sweetly, so kind. His face burned again, he was given no choice but to snake his arms around her lower back and return the hug. 

He gave a weak smile, wanting to so desperately feel her this close to him. She took in all of Simon's scents he gave off, a mixture of cigarettes, cologne, and an almost metallic smell. Generally, the male odor he gave off was attractive. 

She parted from him, for a moment he was saddened at her absence. But he motioned for her to enter his home. 

(Name) stood in the middle of the living room. His apartment was about the size of hers, but a bit larger, and a different layout for the various rooms. Dimly lit and crowded with shelves and books and boxes. The walls were a very light shade of blue, the carpet a grayish color

 He sees the state she's in and chuckles lightly, "Go'on and have a look around." She did just that, swiping her feet slowly along the carpet and wondered into the kitchen. There in the kitchen was his mother, standing over the oven like she was waiting for something to fly out of it. But she quickly noticed the new young girl standing there and approached her with a hand raised.  

"Well hello! you must be (name)" She greeted her with a shake of hands. The girl nodded and smiled to her sweetly, the let go of her hand.    
"I'm glad that my son has made a new friend, it's nice of you to come." The older woman continued. 

The young girl looked down at her hands, fingers rubbing across her knuckles in an anxious manner. "I'm glad to be here." she said soft. 

Simon stood by his bedroom doorway that peered into the kitchen from down the hall, leaning against the wooden frame. He half smiled to himself, glad of his mother's surprisingly easy approval of (name). He stared at her from his distance, her (h/c) hair falling over her shoulders haphazardly, like a ripped curtain. 

from moments he experienced with her close to him, he imagined her hair softer than what it seemed. Her skin was so pale and bright compared to his dark skin. Enjoying the pleasant image of what it would look like to see his skin against hers.   
  
He came back to reality with a red face. (Name) turned around to face him after a short discussion with his mother, she flashed him a smile and walked over to his form leaned by the door. He looked down at the short girl with raised eyebrows as she passed him and entered his room. 

It was cramped and box like,  the walls a dark gray and littered with posters and pictures. His small twin bed with ruffled red sheets in the corner and the only window just across from it. The closet hung wide open, stuffed knee high with clothes. 

He nervously clawed at his hair. "I'm sorry it's a mess (name)..." 

She swayed her head and sat down on his bedside comfortably, giggling at him. "It's perfectly fine Simon." She rested her back against the gray wall and patted the space beside her. 

He looked down at her as she gestured to him, hesitantly trying to sit comfortably next to her. The bed was small, which meant little room for two people, his body fell next to hers and connected by the hips. An awkward angle, he slumped back like she did, his shoulder rest on hers as he looked down at her face with helpless eyes. Uncomfortable, she shifted.   
This was his hint asking her to move on him. 

And like magic, she accepted his attempt to get as possibly close as he could. Her smaller body rose up only to fall back again on his side leaning into his arm, it was extended and wrapped over her shoulder opposite to him. Her head rested in the crook of his neck.   
Now, this was comfortable...

He opened his mouth to comment but nothing fell past his lips, at this moment he was the luckiest he ever had been in his life. This younger girl was leaning into him..so close. 

So warm. 

He was fighting his strong urge to lean closer, to get so closer he could feel her breath on his lips. He just wanted to feel her in every way, in every sense.  
But he held himself still, gliding his fingertips in circles along her shoulder in a sweet manner. 

"Hey Simon?" Her small voice broke the comfortable silence.   
"Hm?" he hummed his response, still tracing her arm with his finger. He leaned his head to the side to look down at her. 

"Thank you." (Name) almost whispered. He dropped his arm as she looked up at him, his eyebrowed furrowed in a frown. "F-for what?" 

"Being my friend." 

His jaw froze, at a loss for words briefly. He was already amazed at how comfortable she was around him, how she accepted him so quickly. He was so grateful in his mind to have this beauty as his companion, but for her to thank him??   
That was a first, never had he gotten any kind of thanks from the others he put his life into. Never a thanks from Sophie for protecting her all through school, for giving her gifts of affection. Never a thanks from David for taking the blame for his stupid pill problems, for keeping him supplied even though he risked himself.   
  
Why now? 

"I.." He began, "I should be thanking you (Name)... I've never had someone like you around."   
Simon bit his bottom lip as he felt her sweet eyes bore into him. "People...leave." 

His dark eyes darted to the side, scared to look back at her.  Something soft grazed over his hand rested in his lap.   
Slowly her turned back and looked down as (name)'s hand wrapping her small, nimble fingers between his. Wrapping around his knuckles, her hand clasped around his. Simon could stop the heat boiling in his face, he started shaking.   
As visible as it was, he was embarrassed and closed his hand in return around hers tightly. This was exactly what he was wanting to do. 

But his shaking was noticeable to her, she squeezed his large hand and whispered,   
"I'm not gonna leave. I promise." 

He slouched his shoulders finally and leaned his head against hers, taking a deep sigh. Adoring the feeling of her skin and her warmth, and blessing her for taking away his voices for this wonderful moment. 


	8. Closer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick Note: I'm so sorry for the really late chapters, but like I said, I'm busy as hell and going through a lot of shit. I haven't even been able to get online much like I normally do. But I would like to thank you all for the patience, and I'm keeping my promise to continue on this story. Its just gonna take a lot longer than normal.

"I'm in love..." He said breathlessly. 

Simon intoxicated himself with another cancer stick, staring up at the stars of the pitch black sky. This was a night he decided to go on a roam around town, clear his mind. His mother never really noticed, or exactly cared that he disappeared some nights. He usually returned home to her after a while. But for any situation, he always had his cell on him.   
  
He casually walked down the steps leading down to the park. His hands in the pockets of his hoodie, leaving the cigarette alone between his lips as he puffed on it. The park was dark and empty like most nights, aside from the usual sound of a car pass, this environment sort of reminded him of his dreams. Except for the comfort knowing the sky was not empty, the world around him was not silent. He wasn't alone.

The sound of the gentle wind and the hum of the living city distracted him from his inner self. His voices a low dim and soon a calming buzz behind his ears when he looked up at the stars that peered through the blackness. The moon nearly full and illuminating the dull shadows that the trees cast around the park grounds.   
Perfectly lining his sunken skin under is tired dark eyes with pale light. His skin a lighter tone, smoke wafting around his nose. 

He wanted to share this moment with his favorite person, the one that invaded his mind more and more everyday. It was insanity how much her face clouded his eyes and screamed louder than his brain could.   
By now, he craved every moment he felt her skin, her small warm hands in his. Most nights they spent laying around so close contact it was almost intimate, the way she caught him staring and instead of turning awkward or insulted, she smiled.   
Her smile swelled his heart and brought blood to his face. 

How desperately he wanted to lean close and meet her lips. But he had conflict in himself.   
He could barely fight it at this point, he wanted to spill out everything.   
Tell her about every dream he had of her. Every goddamn nightmare. Everything he wanted to do with her.   
He wanted to walk around and be able to show her off, holding her hand confidently. 

But at the same time he wanted to lift the burden, spill his blood rather than his thoughts. Leave so she was not tormented by his revolting mind. His anger and hatred was so powerful it even brought his own mother to her knees. He never wanted (Name) to see him in that way.   
  
Then for sure she would leave and his life would be empty again. Or maybe she would finally hear his words of love free from his mouth and reject him like Sophie. 

Either way it will kill him, rotting his guts from the inside out. 

But for now, he gave himself something pleasant to think about, the darkness was more comforting this time. Less ominous and more lightened up from the moon, in a way, Simon was thankful for nights like these. 

Mostly he was thankful for his little slice of peace in his life, the girl that made him smile like an idiot. 

Although he was still very uncertain if his desires were worth living for. Sadly, today as he bathed he drained his arms, washing away long streams of blood in cold water. Then covering them as soon as he got out.   
He enjoyed the numbness of the wounds but grew irritated that they itch once dry. 

Simon rubbed his dirty fingernails along the scabbing skin loosely, opening them again. To him it wasn't all a big deal, the inside of his thick hoodie was already stained with old blood. It was never really noticeable anyway, considering the scars already caked over his tan skin. 

The stinging sensation was almost comfortable to him. Along with another drag of dark smoke.   
Mindlessly he flipped out his phone from his pocket to skim through contacts. He was feeling confident tonight. 

Scrolling through old and forgotten contacts, from top to bottom began with his mother of course, then a row of missed calls from a number labeled 'Do Not Answer'.    
Then David, Lyza, Doctors Ward, Buddy (A dealer), DoNotAnswer, DoNotAnswer, DoNotAnswer, a Hotline. And finally, he smiled down at the glowing name in his phone (nickname). 

Simon hesitated at his keyboard, debating if he really should be bugging her at this time of night.   
She may seem like it was never a big deal for his night terrors, but deep in his brain he still believe he was a burden.   
  
'Get it over with' He told himself, absent of hatefulness under this beautiful sky.  Particularly calmer than usual..   
  
 _Simon- (Nickname):  
_

_You doing anything tonight?_

His anxiety began to creep in again, but slug-like and soft. He took deep breaths and urged himself for patience.   
Pulling himself from the screen and back to the light that hovered above him. Gentle illumination like a candle. Inhaling his last waft of smoke then snapping the stick in half and stopping out the bud with his toe.   
  
The lingering toxic taste on his tongue leaked down his throat, numbing his organs. Tingling withing his eye sockets.   
  
Simon loved to get a perfect high. 

The abrupt buzzing too him by surprise. He fumbled with clumsy fingers, snapping the the little orange button to light up his screen and select the message.   
  
 _1 new message  
(Nickname)-reply: _

_"I'm outside. Where are you?"_

Bubbles formed up in his throat as he choked on loose breaths, his hands visibly shaking. Unsuspecting such a fast reply. But Simon was never one to expect anything good going for his life. He wouldn't be surprised at either turn.  
 He typed a quick sloppy,  _"At the park."_  and set his phone back in his pocket. 

Fixing his posture and clawing at his stubble across his chin with one hand, he made the decision to go a head and smoke another. Tapping the nearly empty box on his knee a few times and pulling one out between two fingers along with a lone lighter. 

He ignited it, warming the bud. Following a sharp feeling of the thick smoke down his throat, it was all the same. Loving the toxins, this was his alternative.   
It was almost disappointing, the fleeting feeling. Gone away too fast and too gradual. His previous addiction was long lasting and satisfying. He closed his eyes to be lost in thought.  
Chills still run up his spine to the memory of a cold sharp needle. Warmth spreading through his body and putting him into a progressive pleasurable coma. Losing all sense of worry, anxiety, stress. Any negative thought would be swept away in a matter of seconds.   
The voices would drain out of his ears and he would simple forget of their existence. Of even his own existence. 

But as his long time life of the drugs was beginning to end, he was much more reliant on theses tasteless cancer sticks.   
  
He just hated the thought of having to light them one after another simply to get a small amount of nicotine in his system. Resulted in him smoking almost a whole pack at once if he stopped resisting.   
It's no good for anyone, but then again what is anymore?

  
"Simon?" 

  
He flinched and dropped the burning end of the cigarette in his lap, singeing his leg through his baggy pants.   
He cursed out loudly and patted it off of him and to the ground. Standing on his feet in quick movements and bringing his defenses up again. 

  
A string of short giggles peered into the silence from the other voice. The male slouched his shoulders and sighed audibly at the sight of his favorite person before him.   
  
"A warning next time please.." His voice broke as he mumbled, earning more laughter from (Name).

She shook her head and stepped towards him, encasing his lower half into a tight hug. This time, Simon returned it without hesitate. Holding her hips to him tightly, like he was desperate for her to not leave. He buried his nose in her hair and inhaled sweetly, taking in her aura. 

She pulled away, but Simon kept her body connected to his, his arms holding her lower back to him. Thankfully, she didn't seem bothered by the close contact. She looked up at him behind long lashes. 

"What are you doing out here this late?" (Name) questioned.   
He shrugged and tilted his head in response, "I had to get out of the house."  

The girl rubbed her shoulders tightly, "In this kind of weather?" Simon dropped his arms and gave her a very concerned look. Then chuckled weakly, noticing her loose fitting t-shirt and cutoffs.  
"You're the one out here with no cover (Name)..." By now he was already craving to hold her again, warm her with his own heat.   
She ignored him with a hum and lead him back to the smoke scented bench he was previously at. 

 When she sat he stood in front of her, not able to stop himself from staring. "(N-name)? I.."   
He bit his tongue, the little words burning his throat again. Existent but never able to form out into his voice. Foreign to his mind, resulting in waves of panic.   
But all she did was smile to him... His favorite smile to see. 

Simon's hands began to shake as he unzipped his hoodie, and slipping it off his shoulders. Almost immediately, the girl waved her hands as a refusal. "Oh Simon, I'm fi-"

"Please.." He almost begged. Draping it over her smaller body, it covered her like a large quilt. Now he was feeling the breeze on his loose, dry skin of his stripped arms.    
She sighed. "Its, warm.."   
  
Finally, he sat next to her, closely this time. He tried with his will not to make it awkward or uncomfortable for her.   
Until she rested her head on his shoulder. Her comfort with him brought ease for the both of them, in a way, Simon knew he was deeply trusted. 

She gently grazed her soft fingertips over the bloodied skin, earning a small gasp from him. He restrained from pulling away, it wouldn't hurt him. (Name) sighed again, looking up at his face.   
"You don't have to keep doing this you know."   
  
Only biting his lip, he chose not to respond. 

The palm of her hand flattened against his wrist and curled her fingers around it. His eyes widened as she guided his arm up towards her.   
Turning over and pulling it close, she pressed her soft warm lips to the scared old tissue. Gently pecking his scares, his open cuts, every impurity that showed he had conflicted on himself. 

Simon's breath was taken away by the feeling of her sweet gesture on his marks of hatred.   
  
When she lifted her head from his arm again, he could only stare. He began to lose control of his movements and began to rely on his deep impulses. 

He took the hand that was on his arm and tightly gripped it with his own, she quickly had a look of surprise. He pulled her towards him with a desperate force, taking his other hand to glide through her hair.   
Simon's lips connected with hers, no consent but pure want. His eyes closed tightly as he tried to savor her. Just as he thought he was safe with this action, hands pressed down on his chest. She pushed him off.   
  
Simon gasped and felt his heart stop. Heat rose to his cheeks as he held his breath. (Names) eyes were wide, staring right into him.   
  
"(N-name) I-I'm.. so s-sorry.." He began babbling, feeling he had just been gutted like a fish.   
"I-I th-thought...I..I--"   
  
"You just surprised me." She whispered. 

Before he could find his words, she had brought her lips back to his with more force and more passion. (Name) quickly wrapped her arms up around his shoulders, pressing herself onto him.   
Simon was taken aback but felt his heart swelling.   
  
His hands tangled back into her hair and his kissed back deeply. He sighed as his teeth grazed her bottom lip..   
  
 _'So sweet...'  
'So soft...'_

His brain focused on her heartbeat, her sweet smelling breaths. The movement of her lips. Her smooth skin and silky hair. His hand wandered down to her lower back, pulling her closer. She obliged and pressed her chest onto his.   
(Name) parted from him to suck in much needed air, but Simon only attacked her lips again hungrily. She hummed, moving into is lips quickly and pulling back again.   
Her small hand cupped his stubbled chin, resting her forehead on his. 

"Simon..." She whispered, "It's getting late." 

His lidded dark eyes looked into hers, nodding slightly. "Yeah." 

They stood and Simon reached for her hand, tucked under his jacket she wore. "I'll walk you home." She smiled, taking his hand.   
  
He returned the smile, noticing the faded red on her face.  
  
"Hey Simon?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Lets do this again."  
  
..........

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry I added my own name 'Lyza' into his contacts cuz I couldn't think of anything xD I'm not part of the story don't worry. Also I feel like I use too much repetition in this. Let me know if I got anything wrong, these chapters were written over the course of a few weeks.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this story on my wattpad if you want to get immediate updates. https://www.wattpad.com/user/KillerBeats873
> 
> I will continue this I promise


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